Today is different and I feel a deep sense of care towards all of you out there who maybe are struggling like me. Struggling with understanding your emotional behavior, your mind, your soul and your reaction to this world and its surroundings. I’m not saying that by continuing to read this article you might get the answers you are seeking or the healing you might need but actually it might give you a bit of insight from my own personal experience.
I have always struggled with life and people, in particular I had big troubles understanding my own emotional reaction to both. I was always, constantly trying to understand why I feel what I am feeling. Always, I tried to find various ways to hide from it and just pretend the feelings were not there, well, let me tell you…that doesn’t ever work. When comes to love, ugh that’s even harder, all my attention always focused on the other, never on myself. Hence very dramatic and toxic emotional reactions shook me when I discovered unspoken truths.
I began by reading about other people’s experiences with the same problems, watching all sorts of videos, listening to random podcasts, reading related books, going to a shrink even! I am not saying I know it all and I am all healed. No, not at all. I still feel I don’t know many things. I still struggle with my emotions and with understanding them. However now, slowly everything feels different. I feel progress, I keep on working on myself and I harvest my crop...slowly but surely.
Certain techniques actually work on helping to let go of unwanted but stuck negative emotions, suppressed traumatic memories, unhealthy repetitive patterns. It’s not an easy process but after using certain techniques and plant medicine I do feel better. It makes me feel proud to make steps towards my own better self. I started by asking myself questions. When you start asking questions, then you are looking inside and not outside. Why am I doing that? What do I feel? How can I change it? How can I change the results of my own actions? This is how everything begins in your journey. By asking the right questions!
One technique I found interesting was a Buddhist practice that is featured in the Four Noble Truths. Write a letter, read it out loud then burn it. Simple as that, but yet so powerful! Has there been someone in your life (alive or deceased) that you have negative feelings toward? It could be an ex-lover, parent, spouse or work colleague - anybody that conjures up ill-feelings that led to an event that traumatized you. Well, now's the time to sit down and write them a letter telling them exactly how you feel - but whatever you do, do not post it or share it...instead read it out loud to yourself only, when you are done.
You must allow yourself complete freedom to write whatever you want. Swear and curse if you feel the need and write down everything that you feel about this person and your relationship with them. Write about why you feel the way you do. For me, this was a very powerful emotional healing technique. No-one will judge you! Be sure that you are writing to the person directly, as if you were talking to their face. I’ve tried this technique several times and it does feel better. But why? Because of the simple reason that you let go of what you are holding onto so dearly in your mind and soul. You let these feelings out in writing, and when you burn the letter, it feels literally like you let go of them as they turn to smoke. I would personally burn Palo Santo wood as well in the same time, just to clean the energy around. I actually smiled each time. It works! If we can change how we feel about a memory that is from the past then we can ask ourselves why not learn more about how to do it? What is behind that event or person that made you feel so strongly? Why do you hold onto it so much? Does it serve you in this present moment?
Emotional intelligence is a key that helps us figure this world out. It also helps us to figure out the “real you” deep down in yourself, the “you” that has been lost in experiences, memories, beliefs, judgements and projections of others! And it helps us to understand other people. Incredible! Emotional intelligence is more important than any other knowledge. Resetting our mind into transforming negative memories into a positive or neutral memory is not easy, I know! But hey, it’s really possible. How much do you want to let go of that trauma, anxiety or hurt? How much do you want to be a better, happier, peaceful and more balanced “you”?
"All emotions, even those that are suppressed and unexpressed, have physical effects. Unexpressed emotions tend to stay in the body like small ticking time bombs - they are illnesses in incubation." Marilyn Van Derbour
It’s worth trying! Or you can just think about it for a second.
Copyright: @GregGoodale (Thank you for existing in my life!)